God makes us what we are. No more no less. All we can do is try our hardest with what God gives us. Personally I find myself at a place in my life where I question what motives drive me. Am I having fun with what I am trying to do. The answer is yes. Yes I am having the time of my life! Sure things would be easier for me if I were to land this double flip every time I try it. Sure I would probably have many more people who are in to what I do. Fact is I wouldn't have my life any other way. I have always said "if something comes easy you wont respect it or apreciate what it took to get there". I am tryign to soak up all I can with all these experiences, weather ending in a crash or land. I am traveling the world and I have an awesome family who is so supportive. Fact is every other judgemental person in the world has something negative to say of me or of my effort in this life and I feel a sense of sorrow for them. I am sorry you are so concearned with what I am trying to do with my life, you fail to go and experience this for yourself. You sure are missing out!
 We showed up in Ostrava on a wednesday morning. Beat up and tired, we made our way to the venue to have a look. Once in the building I felt much better about things . I knew I wouldnt hit the roof and I had seen my barrel of VP C 12...or so I thought.
 The next day we set everything up. The day went fast as everything seemed to be a mess. Lucas was on his phone pretty much all day lining up my ramp's arrival and to top it all off the promoter didnt have the 2007 model bike they claimed to have. It was a 2010 model. This wouldnt have been a big deal had they told us. I could have trained and broughtr my 2008 suspeinsion with and there would have been no harm no foul. Unfortunately for us they didnt realize this importance and Lucas had to swap fork internals. This isnt really a big deal but the last thing I want to have is things changing on the day of the event.  Towards the end of the day Lucas told me the bike was sweet and had way more power than the bikes I have at home. What a relief that was. Normaly the bike is far under powered and makes my day very dificult.
 Show day rolled on in. As usual. I woke up rested and feeling great! I felt strong and there was no rush!  We got to the venue in time to watch some practice rounds for the other competitors and what was nice to see is I feel I am closing the gap with my own capabilities at home!  After practice was finished for everyone else, they told me it was my turn. I was so excited to jump my ramp straight up for the first time to a dirt landing! As a group of us were setting the ramp in place I heard the begining of my woes. Across the venue I heard the muckling of a improperly running YZ 250 with a huge hiccup right in the middle of the RPM range. NOT GOOD! I made my way over towards Lucas and he exclaimed he thought it is just a fresh ring. She wil seat up and be fine. Now I had never heard a ring make a bike run improperly so I mentioned the jetting. Lucas and Mini got right on it and found a much leaner setting in this bike than what would be required by my cylinder from home. The changes made and the bike still would not carburate properly. Mini and Lucas tag teamed my bike for what ended up being two hours and while standing in my gear waiting I could smell what was supposed to be VP C12 draining out of the float bowl. This was not the C12 required in my contract! I went over to the bike and pulled the gas cap off and had a smell. This gas smelled like what they use in monster trucks back home! Right there I knew things just turned for the worse. The mechanics drained the fuel and replaced it with the European premium pump gas. Lucas had mad some calls and others said it would run fine with my cylinder and once changed they were right. The bike was carburating perfectly now however once I got on it and ripped around a bit I knew it was very under powered. This has meant in my experience that I will have to pull harder and risk pulling myself right off the bike. I explained this to many other people including my mechanic and everyone was looking at me like are you going to still try or no. Now I am not one to let things stop me from doing my job. I would deem wind as an issue I dont like to mess with. I would say snow isnt fun to ride in and I would say an under powered bike is something I should be able to deal with. I opted to go ahead with my part of the show.
  As the competition flew by I never felt a sense of nervousness or fear in any way. Sure I was anxious but thats because I was so excited! I had so much faith and confidence I was going to be ok. Connie and I sat by my bike and did our usual" I love you" and what ends up being a great pep talk and before I knew it I had to gear up and do my thing. Connie and I said our prayers together and as she put on our armour I felt a rush of focus and strength come over me. I was ready. The plan to jump three times then double back. I could feel the bike running well but could feel the lack of  power down low.
 When I pulled back to flip I could feel my body slip back and away from the foot pegs and knew I was in trouble. Normally at home I would have my superflip bars on my bike but due to being judged for what I look like and who I am, I decided to leave them in my box. The last thing I want is to look rediculous.
I remember as I drifted from my bike thinking this sucks. I knew I was in for a big hit. As I fell towards the ground I leaned on God entirely. I prayed for him to handle this for  me. Basically I let go and accepted what was happening. Nothing I could do would make it any better. Physics wont allow you to get back to the bike without leverage. Needless to say I was in a tight spot. 
 As I came too, I could hardly breath due to a blood plugged nose and a neck support  cutting off my air supply, I wasnt a happy camper. I am not too big on being held down even if for my own good. The EMT's did an awesome job taking care of me but I need to breath first. I knew I had messed up my left hand and my chest hurt on my left side. I could remember everything immediately up to hitting the ground. I could feel the hit but was nocked out from it. All in all my mind was ok. I have been hit harder. Unfortunately for my left hand and the next night I had a new four inch scar to look forward to. At this point we are on the way to the hospital and I am a mess. I dont understand why I keep doing this. The two weeks before I had done so many double flips and had trained my body so much. People can say what they want about me being or not being an athlete because of success or failure but I know I am an athlete and would invite any person to come over and hang with us in training. Im not saying "no one can hang". I AM saying no one will leave calling us slouches who dont put in the time. And for that matter,how about my ability to take a hit. I attest that my getting up over and over again is due to God and my athletic training I put myself through.  Anyone calling this luck is crazy. Sure crashing once and getting up is maybe luck but with me, I would say there is more than luck playing a part. have you seen how many times I have crashed?!
The next day I woke up in my hotel room and didnt want to move anywhere but home. Again my wife, who is my crutch holding me up so often, jumps to action and keeps me smiling. We went over to the venue to watch practic and see the riders. I couldn't believe how each rider approached me and how they couldnt beieve I was there hanging out. Kinda helped me feel belonged rather than outcast. The bike was already tore down and my ramp was being boxed up.  I couldnt believe what had happened. Sometimes we dont understand why God works in ways He does but one thing I do know is why He allows us to fall down....To learn to pick ourself back up.
  I believe God has found favour in me. I am ok physically as well as mentally....well as good as I was before this whole thing. I will ride again soon and have every intention of double flipping again. Perhaps the reasons are not for me to know why this keeps happening. What I do know is God has made me a very resiliant person for a reason.  A huge thanks to everyone who has shown concern for me.See you soon.